The Apprentice

Being perhaps the last person in the country to have cottoned on to The Apprentice and only ever having watched two episodes previously, it is with a sense of curious detachment that I find myself being drawn to this evening’s edition. Read more

Scotsport SPL

The phrase car-crash television comes nowhere close to doing this excuse for a programme justice. Read more

England’s Dream Team

We have a saying in our house; every day’s a school day. And, thanks to England’s Dream Team, we learned that, but for the bizarre combination of the Munich Air Disaster and a dodgy enchilada, England would have won the World Cup in 1958, 1962 and 1970. Read more

Still Game

Choo! Choo! All aboard the Craiglang Express! Rockets, nuggets and bawbags step right up for another magical mystery tour penetrating deep into the heartland’s (and the badlands) of the modern, everyday working-class pensioner. Read more

Emmerdale

There was a delicious sense of irony apparent as the cast of Coronation Street collected their BAFTA t’other night. Read more

Without a Trace

Whilst we in Britain suffer the lamentably lame Murder in Suburbia and endure the dubious viewing pleasure of watching the risible Murder City, Jerry Bruckenheimer would appear to waging a one-man executive producer war to deliver as many quality police dramas on American television as he possibly can. Read more

Feather Boy

After a wave of negative experiences with regards to poor writing of late, it is only fair that I doff my cap in the direction of this wonderful piece of drama that, once again, underlines the BBC’s strength of commitment to, and complete respect for, children’s television. Read more

Hustle

The accusation that it is all style and no substance is a charge that Hustle is inherently guilty of. Not that this is a bad thing, you understand. Read more

Murder in Suburbia

“What’s our single most important rule about men, Scribbs?”/”No bad boys.”/”Because?”/”They’re bad.”/”And?”/”They’re boys.” Read more

Cheers

Occasionally, just occasionally, you manage to catch a little slice of history on your screen and it fills your heart with joy that you witnessed something special. Read more

About a Bar Mitzvah Boy

Continuing to build upon its impressive reputation, BBC Scotland’s EX-S documentary team produced another lovely little gem in this, the tale of Sean Winston, a Glaswegian Bar Mitzvah boy. Read more

Friends

At first glance, it would appear that Friends and Gimme, Gimme, Gimme make for uncomfortable bedfellows. However, no two sitcoms of recent times have received quite the same level of vitriolic abuse and bitter, undiluted contempt from critics (both amateur and professional) than these mismatched partners. Read more

Weir’s Way

You’re stuck on a night-shift and your only companion is a two inch television monitor. Strangely enough, the lure of G-String Divas on five is minimal, as is a signed repeat of A Life of Grime. Read more

EastEnders

Is EastEnders on the cusp of a return to greatness or riding on the crest of a wave of mediocrity? Make your own mind up. However, what cannot be denied is that the writers have, at the present time, a golden opportunity to snatch victory from the jaws of the aforementioned mediocrity. Read more

French Leave

And with that, they were gone. The departure of the Burton Race family from our screens will leave a poignant gap in the schedules. Derided by the critics, this show has managed to turn their petty words into straw with contemptuous ease. Read more

Room 101

Just like pop, Room 101 has finally managed to eat itself. For too long, the show has teetered on the brink of mediocrity, threatening to sink forever into that particular abyss. Read more

Home and Away

Here’s a blast from the past for all you Summer Bay fanatics. The last time I watched this show that scheming bitch (but utter fox) Alison Paterson was at the centre of all things mean and moody. Roo and Bobby were at loggerheads and Donald Fisher was still to attain the moniker of Flathead. Read more

Days that Shook the World

It’s the opening sentence in the commentary and already we’re immediately historically inaccurate. And as each minute passes, the inaccuracies rain down with astonishing rapidity. Whilst a degree of objectivity is only to be expected, outright falsehoods and blatant misreading of the truth are not. Read more

EastEnders

When I last reviewed this august institution, my negative – though, as I saw it, constructive – criticisms resulted in me receiving a barrage of hate mail from irate acolytes of this show. Read more

The Big Read

With predictable bitchiness, I noted that a columnist in my local rag, The Herald, opined that he “hated the public’s opinion in these programmes”. Clearly, our opinion counts for nothing. Read more

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